


You are a promise

by Marlynastre



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Blackwall's infamous bucket incident, Drunk Solas, F/M, Fluff, It's fluff if they're hugging right, Solas Fluff Friday, There's a lot of hugging, as fluffy as I can do anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-20
Updated: 2015-09-20
Packaged: 2018-04-22 15:40:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4841000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marlynastre/pseuds/Marlynastre
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“So… how much did you have to drink, exactly?” A low chuckle met her question and she couldn’t help but smile.</i>
</p><p>  <i>Solas was swaying slowly from left to right; his arms still wrapped up around her waist in a loose embrace, his face hidden in her shoulder to hide the light flush on his cheeks. </i></p><p>  <i>“No more than two,” he insisted, his voice slow to hide the slur that threatened to show every other syllable.  </i></p><p>  <i>“Either you are a liar, or you are the light weight to rule them all, hahren.”</i></p><p>  <i>“I would never lie to you, da’len. …Not directly.”</i></p><p>  Or that one time where Blackwall tries to teach Solas how to play Diamondback, and Dorian gets him drunk in order to win.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You are a promise

Did someone play God with time magic without warning her again? The War meeting felt like it was never going to end, running well into the night when it was supposed to end before dinner. The coming peace talks between the Tevinter Imperium and the Kingdom of Nevarra were at the center of very heated debates among her advisors. Brokering peace between the two states was so crucial to the fate of Thedas that it required them to scrutinize every single detail of the Inquisition involvement as their mediator. 

Problem was, no one agreed on any of these details, and Halamera was not versed enough in nevarran and tevene culture to make clear decisions on her own. Cullen was currently pacing about, his fingers angrily fidgeting the hilt of his sword when they weren’t rubbing the back of his neck. Leliana had withdrawn into complete silence, something they all dreaded more than the seven Blights combined. Josephine and Cassandra, whose advice has been sought on the matter, had given up trying to teach the Inquisitor the peculiarities of nevarran ceremonies and were instead going over the list of envoys in ardent whispers.

Her advisors were just about to declare the dissolution of the Inquisition because Halamera refused to lift her veto on crimson velour for their envoys when the doors burst open and Dorian’s voice echoed:

“Well well, it seems the Inquisition’s greatest are in dire need of my wisdom! Fear not, the scion of House Pavus is here to save the night!”

“You’re _late_ ,” all three of the Inquisition’s greatest chorused, finding a new victim on which to focus their murderous urges.

“Only fashionably!”

“The meeting started well before dusk.” 

“You’ve been drinking,” Cullen stated deadpan.

“And what else should a man do on a fine evening?” 

“Your opinion was needed hours ago!” Josephine erupted in a manner quite at a variance with her usual composed and amiable self. She looked ready to stab the mage in the eye, with her quill no less. “We need a clear understanding of Tevinter’s motivations for attacking-”

“Why are you wearing Solas’ necklace?” 

Everyone turned towards Snowflake who was looking up from the war table and was eyeing Dorian suspiciously. The wolf jawbone was hidden among the many folds of his latest robes but there was no mistaking the black cord around his neck and the smell of old leather and herbs that accompanied it. His smell. How in the Void did it end up in Dorian’s hands? Solas only took it off when he was sleeping.

“Now before you call me a thief,” the mage said, mirroring her train of thoughts perfectly, “I will remind you that cheating is a perfectly valid tactic when you have no chance of winning by fair means in a game of cards. Be thankful he didn’t bet his clothes! Although the same cannot be said of that poor Blackwall… When I left them, he was down to his-”

_“Dorian Pavus.”_

“Lady Ambassador Josephine Cherette Montilyet ?” He turned to the Antivan woman and gave her a graceful bow even though his eyes, alight with mischief, were still challenging the Inquisitor to call him a liar and a thief. 

“Surely the latest tales of your drunk exploits can wait until the end of the meeting. Have you any idea how much time we lost because of your irresponsible habits?” 

“Jealous you could not join in the fun, Ambassador? Or frustrated I got to see our dear Warden’s perfectly chiselled backside before you?” 

There was an uneasy shifting in the room. Cullen and Cassandra glanced at each other, ready to intervene should it come down to nails and fireballs. But it was the start of a glacial smile creeping up on Leliana’s lips that resolved Halamera into taking action. Rising up from her chair, she slammed the closest book she could find on the table. When she was sure to have everyone’s attention, she walked between Dorian and Josephine.

If they wanted to fight, they would have to do so over her dead body, and her death would require way too much paperwork for Josephine to consider this option. 

“The Inquisitor -that would be me, until further notice- officially calls for the end of tonight’s meeting then. I’m sorry Josie, I don’t see anything good coming out of this tonight and Cassandra looks like she’s going to strangle me if I get any mortalitasi names wrong one more time. Dorian, you will write a written apology to Lady Montilyet as well as a full report on Tevinter political situation regarding Nevarra. I want them on my desk by lunch, and by lunch, I mean midday, not whenever you sober up. Now, let’s reconvene tomorrow with a fresh start when I actually know what is going on. And no, I will not change my mind on the uniforms!” She snarled as Cullen opened his mouth to intercede. 

When they were the only two people left in the stuffy war room, Snowflake crossed her arms and glared daggers at Dorian, the inquisitorial look that said “Tell me everything or I will have you listen to my Hart or two full hours.” Unfortunately for her, Dorian knew her too well, he knew that she crossed her arms to make herself more imposing, that she wore an official vest that broadened her shoulders and heels that made her appear taller. He also knew that she liked him way too much to stay angry at him for more than a minute.  
So he patiently waited the whole minute with a smile and a sip of the bottle he had hidden, delighting in the sight of her short-lived anger.

“These lips are sealed, Hala dear, you will not get a single word out of me about how we enrolled your second favourite man in a game of Diamondback.”

His hands went to Solas’ necklace and removed it carefully from his neck, placing it directly in her hands with a care that surprised her.

“Obviously, you took it back from me with great effort, and after admitting defeat in a duel of magical prowess, you were reduced to making offers that would make even kings blush. I expect you to tell me all the details tomorrow morning, of course.” 

With a wink and a peck on her cheek he was off before she could call him back, and she stood there confused, her fingers wrapped around her lover’s necklace. What had Dorian been up to? How did they persuade Solas to part with such a precious item? Or to play cards when he had refused to join them for their occasional Wicked Grace? What even happened to Blackwall? 

 

She was no closer to the truth when she reached her chambers after strolling one last time through the corridors of Skyhold. A headache throbbed in her temples and she longed for nothing more than sleep, but there was so much to do yet. If Solas had been in the rotunda she could have asked for his council on the peace treaties, but as she expected the room had been empty and dark. 

Something tightened in her chest, at the reminder that she wasn’t there with her friends playing Diamondback. She couldn’t hold it against them to organize it without her of course. She even felt relieved that they’d finally managed to take Solas out of his studies for a couple hours. The elf was no stranger to long periods of melancholy where he would spend his days in the rotunda accumulating books and exploring the Fade in his dreams; it had grown worse the longer Corypheus ran free. She could take his mind off those unknown chimeras most of the time but she was glad the members of her inner circle were looking out for one another. Her little clan, she mused as she leaned on her balcony at the top of the fortress.

How she longed for the first times of their endeavour now, peaceful nights by the campfire and laughter ringing in the air every other sentence? They didn’t even go out on reconnaissance missions anymore. When had the world gone so awry that they had all forgotten to take a moment to smile and take joy in the company of each other? How heavy the mantle of Inquisitor felt now, a grim cloak pressing on her shoulders and shielding her from the rest of the world.

The Herald’s rest was still lit. Maybe if she hurried…?

She had been brooding like this for a couple minutes when the doors of her quarters opened and slow footsteps could be heard on the soft rugs scattered on the floor. Her brow furrowed at the heavy scent of alcohol brought by the light breeze, but before she could turn to greet him Solas crept up behind her and pressed his body against her back, his skin deliciously warm against the night air. She put her head back against him, her hands covering his own on her stomach. Admittedly that was as much a caring gesture as it was to stabilize them, lest he made them topple over the railing of the balcony and meet their untimely death on Skyhold’s pavement.

They said nothing for a while, reveling in each other’s presence. His affection was always so scarce and held back, Snowflake felt grateful for every single touch especially at a time when she needed it. And Mythal did she need it right now, some intimacy to keep The Inquisitor away, to become Snowflake again for a few minutes. He was breathing against her neck, pulling her even closer, as if he was trying to etch her on his skin. That was the way his hugs always were, sudden and brash, wordless, as if she’d fly away at the slightest hesitation. There was a slow swelling in her heart, a bubble that always arose when he was near. A steady quietness that overtook her nerves, a feeling of completion at his sight. Home, she thought. Home. 

“So… how much did you have to drink, exactly?” A low chuckle met her question and she couldn’t help but smile.

Solas was swaying slowly from left to right; his arms still wrapped up around her waist in a loose embrace, his face hidden in her shoulder to hide the light flush on his cheeks. 

“No more than two,” he insisted, his voice slow to hide the slur that threatened to show every other syllable. 

“Either you are a liar, or you are the light weight to rule them all, _hahren_.”

“I would never lie to you, _da’len_. …Not directly.”

He pressed his head against hers, his lips lost in her snowy hair. 

“So there is more to this story,” she replied coyly. “And by this, I mean there was more to this drink than Cabot’s ale.”

Solas stayed silent for a while, choosing his words carefully the way he always did when she prodded after the hidden truth in his stories. 

“ … It has been a while. My body is not used to ingesting large quantities of alcohol anymore. I did not suspect that Blackwall’s invitation to teach me the subtleties of Diamondback would include Dorian and his seemingly endless reserves of fine liquors.” 

“You don’t know how to play Diamondback? She asked amused. Don’t spirits play cards in the Fade then?”

“I am a quick learner. I do not think they expected me to understand its unspoken rules and strategies so fast. That would certainly explain why they resorted to intoxication and treachery against a beginner.”

His voice was so bitter that she could not help but laugh. Solas was the sorest loser she knew of, save maybe for Cullen when he was defeated in a game of chess. 

“Inquisitor to the rescue,” she smirked producing the jawbone necklace from her pocket and putting it back around his neck herself, her hands lingering on him longer than necessary.

“Do I want to know what you had to do to fix my mistakes?”

“It was horrible. It‘ll require a lot of soothing on your part to help me through this traumatic experience.”

“I am certain you will find my soothing skills more than adequate, Inquisitor.”

He slowly stepped away and she guided him back in the room. Save for the slowness of his movements and speech, he kept remarkable control over his drunk body. There was that, and his… unexpected openness. Something to treasure while it lasted, Snowflake pondered as she joined him on the edge of the bed. In the few seconds of darkness it had taken them to walk back and light candles, he had gone back to his morose self. His gaze was lost somewhere over her shoulder, to a horizon she could not see and he refused to reveal. 

“These are good people, he whispered to himself. I will remember them when all of this is done, small moments of peace to find before upcoming battles. I was not unlike them in earlier times, you know. I used to be young and cocky, and prone to cheating for the sake of seeing a friend in an embarrassing situa-...”

He trailed off and shifted away from her. The soft light of the candles revealed his jaws muscles clenching on words he forced back in an attempt to control his thoughts. She put a caring hand on his arm, bringing his eyes back to her :

“You don’t have to fear this, Solas. I would not want to take advantage of this, nor do I want you to say or do something you would regret later. I would rather… I would much rather you did because you trust me. At your own pace.” 

He shifted to plant a kiss on her forehead then, a soft and restrained kiss with trembling lips, a thank you he could not voice without betraying himself. His voice was still hoarse and tight when he admitted:

“I… did not come here without second thoughts. Not that kind of second thoughts,” he smiled despite himself. “Sleep evades me. The alcohol affected my capacity to enter the Fade, something I had not predicted or anticipated. I did not realise what happened until I tried to go to sleep. I feel… blind, almost, and you are the only light piercing through the darkness. I did not know where else to turn.”

She looked at him disconcerted. Disconnected from the Fade? To any other person, it would be a passing annoyance, but to Solas… Of all the mages she knew, he was the most sensitive to its presence and to the tremors of the Veil. How did he not break down in screams yet? How did it even happen? From her own experience, Dorian tended to create even bigger flames when under the influence of brandy. 

“Why didn’t you tell me straight away? I know how important it is to you! Is there something we can do to… wouldn’t the healers provide you with a sleeping drought?”

“Sleeping droughts provide dreamless nights, Vhenan, an alternative which would be worse than the current state. It is agonizing enough that I feel it slip away from my grasp. There is something you can do however. I cannot trust my own magic right now, but if you use yours, you can remove all traces of toxin from the bloodstream and speed the recovery.” 

“I’ve never done it before, I’m not sure I can...”

“I will guide you.” 

"Are you really alright, Solas ?"

“I will be, Vhenan. Besides, Leliana would never forgive me for making you worry about me all night when you have the world to save at dawn.” 

“You are impossible, you know that?” she sighed as she pushed him onto the bed until he was lying down, helping him out of belt and shirt. 

They were so rarely intimate with one another and yet there he was, half naked on her bed, incapable of standing straight without falling over. Also incapable of casting magic, which had her so worried she kept all her lustful thoughts at bay. Dorian must have slipped Dragon’s piss in his drink when he wasn’t looking. The only time Bull convinced her to drink that horrible stuff, she did not remember a single thing of what had happened that evening, apart from the fact that she had woken up in Mother Giselle’s bed. Naked. Mother Giselle screaming at the top of her lungs when she discovered her. 

Solas showed her as promised, by putting his hands on top of hers, making her fingers trace the arteries and veins surrounding his heart. “A simple enough cleansing spell”, he explained, “treat it like you would treat a poison, by purifying the bloodstream. No need to rush, one heartbeat at a time. Like this. Feel it? ” Her magic was glowing faintly, casting light on the sharp angles of his face, his shoulders, the planes of his stomach. She could feel his blood pumping through her mana, the usual slowness of his heartbeat replaced with the slightly arrhythmic throbbing of drunkenness. The inquisitor focused her will on his rhythm until it subsided and aligned with her own, beating in unison. His fingers were tracing abstract glyphs on her forearms, and for a time there was no sound except for the quiet hum of healing magic. 

“Should I continue if you fall asleep?” Hala inquired, seeing his eyes starting to lose focus and his lips slowly parting.

“ I would rather… I beg that you keep me awake. In such a state, I would be vulnerable to nightmares I could not control. …I fear what would happen then. Please.”

“I’m here, my love. I’ll keep you safe.”

The words had been uttered before she could stop them and Creators did she wish she could take them back. Terms of endearment were always few between them, but this had been her heart pouring out of her lips uncensored ; Solas knew it too, and she felt it in the way his heart suddenly beat faster, trying to break free of his chest. A low and heavy drumbeat between them - it suited them, she thought. A secret music no one else could hear, at the tips of their fingers, when there were no words, no oaths to describe what they shared. She held his gaze without faltering. She would stand by her words now that they were out in the open and she dared her to think any less of her. 

_Tha-Thump. Tha-Thump. Tha-thump._

 

If he could give her the world, this instant… 

He broke their stare at last, closing his eyes when a surge of mana came too close to his upset stomach and stirred its contents. She stopped casting, fearing she did more wring than good on his system. _If he could give her the world…_ His fingers brushed wild strands away from her face, retracing the large scar at the edge of her right ear. 

“Varric was right in choosing such a name for you.” 

“‘Snowflake’? He was just making fun of me. She scoffed. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but my hair and vallaslin are white and I have blue eyes. It’s an easy analogy.” 

“There is so much more behind it. Varric is no fool when it comes to words, but even he does not see all that I see when I look at you. A kiss. My little Snowflake.” 

He lifted himself up to a sitting position then and carefully cradled her against his chest. The world had stopped spinning and he felt the fog lifting from his senses. Her spell had done wonders on his system, so much that the Fade was just a dream away… yet reality was so much more enticing at this moment.

“You melt away in my grasping fingers and I am not powerful enough to shield you from the flow of time. There will be only water to remember you by, fleeting memories, and I cannot bear the thought of losing you.” 

Her back had tensed, in contrast to the soft laugh that shook her. How cherished her voice in the crook of his neck, how cherished the memory of her every word? 

“Is reminding a girl of her inescapable mortality your best flirting strategy? I should introduce you to Dorian.” 

He smiled at the contradiction between her words and her movements, when she hugged him closer to stop the shaking that had started in her shoulders. A sign he knew too well. She rarely cried or showed any sign of distress and yet, when the accumulated tension of the Inquisition was enough to overflow her control, her shoulders would inevitably start to tremble. Solas felt terribly guilty for making her worry about him over something so inconsequential as heavy drinking. 

“Can you not see how much more precious you are to me?” His voice lowered until it was only whispers. Let even the sky be denied the right to hear his naked heart. 

“You are a promise. You are a promise of all colours yet to be, colours I never thought could become true, a white canvas of possibilities not yet dreamed by anyone. You are the crystal grace that blooms in the cracks of old ruins to replace the paint long flaked away. You are the raging snowstorm and you trap the world into your hands only to shape it into a brighter tomorrow. There is a purity of shape, a uniqueness that separates you from all others and cannot be found once it’s gone. No matter how far one looks.”

_Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump._

“You are innocence fallen from the sky and others may shape you to their will, but you bring smiles to the child in every single one of us. You are the shrouded horizon in which people lose themselves, only to emerge cleansed and grateful for what they have. You are a promise of tomorrows, a promise of future warmth and quieter times.” 

His lips ghosted over hers, sealing his words in her mouth lest they dissipate forgotten in the night air. 

“And you are the proof, my living proof, my sweet and terrible proof that the world did not disappear just because I could not see it anymore.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading ! 
> 
> This one shot was written for Solas Fluff Friday.
> 
> This is my very first Dragon Age fanfiction, and it would mean a lot to me if you stopped by even if you don't have anything to say apart from "gazebo". I love gazebos.
> 
> This fic is also on my Tumblr [ here :)](http://inquisitor-marlynastre.tumblr.com/post/129527335369/you-are-a-promise)
> 
> Edit: holy Dumbledore, 200 views in less than ten hours? You guys are just the best. <3


End file.
